The Force Awakens was too similar to A New Hope and The Last Jedi was too far out and different than anything that Star Wars fans are used to. Pair that with a bunch of disappointment in regard to the decisions of director Rian Johnson and the fans are not happy. That’s where this new fake crawl for Star Wars 9 comes into play. Just about every complaint about The Last Jedi has been addressed in this nearly 4-minute video and it’s pretty awesome. There are SPOILERS for The Last Jedi ahead, so read at your own risk.
The fake crawl has Star Wars 9 titled A New Rebellion and begins right as The Last Jedi ends, but it takes a quick turn fixing up some problems. First of all, it claims that Luke Skywalker didn’t die. Instead, what we saw was a clone and Luke will be back to do some amazing things that “he never got to do before.” This last bit is obviously poking a little bit of fun at Luke’s death and astral projection Force powers that we had never seen him use before.
Next up, Kylo Ren’s helmet makes it back with a brand-new version that he will not bust up this time around. This is a bit of a controversial take between Star Wars fans. Some believe that Kylo Ren should have had his helmet on for a lot longer in The Force Awakens, while many fans were happy to see him destroy the helmet in The Last Jedi as a way of ditching his superficial Darth Vader obsession. Elsewhere, Snoke is back as an epic Dark Side Force ghost who will never be tricked again. The fake crawl goes on to tease the fact that we didn’t get to see any of his backstory and reveals that he’ll get into a battle with the Knights of Ren.
Rey’s parents are even brought up in this fake Star Wars 9 crawl while tying in Chewbacca and Rose’s new-found friendship. The two travel to Tatooine in an effort to find Rey’s real parents and then the crawl shows a list of just about every major Star Wars character in an effort to figure out who the true parents are. Spoiler alert: the fake crawl says that Boba Fett and Captain Phasma are Rey’s real parents. There’s plenty of more to check out in the hilarious fake crawl.
While the Star Wars 9 crawl is fake, it does bring up some interesting questions of where J.J. Abrams will take the movie. Some of this might actually end up getting addressed, except for the Porg piloting an X-Wing Fighter, that probably won’t happen. We’ll probably see the return of Luke as a Force ghost and Rey’s parents might get explored a little bit more, but the Snoke bit would actually be pretty cool. You can check out the fake crawl for Star Wars 9 over at Nerdist’s YouTube channel.